Five years ago I started smoking crack and heroin. Everything I owned went. If I didn’t sell it, I’d swap it for drugs. Crack became my life, you might even say it became my wife. I was married to the pipe. The change in me was fast. I started stealing and robbing and I would just do anything to get the drugs. I didn’t realise that I was addicted until I started losing my family and friends. Things came to a head for me when I robbed a shop. I had to stop and take a good look at myself. I gave myself up to the police – after they charged me I started looking for help. I found out about the Ley from my drugs worker. From my first contact with the Ley, they supported me by phoning me at home often to see how I was getting on. I found it real easy to speak to staff on the phone. The staff worked with my solicitor and they both got me here. Being here I found out that I used drugs to hide from how I was feeling.

When I arrived at the Ley there were but a few black people here. Black people today are faced with few positive self-images of our true potential. I first felt nervous and apprehensive, but as time has passed I have realised that I am an individual and hold the key to my future and the colour or gender should not affect me moving forward.By being at the Ley, I have just started to take a different approach to life. If I was handed a gun to kill myself I would not. Yet I was using drugs to kill myself – what’s the difference?

I’m 18 and Asian, brought up in Britain.  I had a good lifestyle until the age of 12 when I started using drugs.  Coming to the Ley was the hardest decision I’ve made, and it’s been hard here – but sometimes you need to work hard to succeed in life.

Recently I went home to visit my family.  I felt like I was a new born person.  I wasn’t paranoid walking down the street.  I didn’t need to look behind my back to see if anyone was after me.  I wasn’t frustrated.  I was really confident with myself.

Anyway, I bumped into one of my old friends that I was close to.  He was saying how much I’ve changed, but he was still out there on drugs, walking up and down the street trying to make some money to support his habit.  I told him get some help.  Nothing will change if you don’t want it to change.  Things are still the same – only I’ve changed, that’s what I’ve noticed.  I know he had drugs on him, he was out of his face.  I could have used if I wanted to but I knew the dangers.

I can’t lose the respect I’ve gained and I will not throw that away for nothing.  I say to myself my future is looking bright.  Life is what I make it.  Nothing changes out there – same everyday, waking up needing drugs.  There is a better life than being on drugs, so I’d think twice.